Great Birth Quotes

I’m in the process of updating my testimonials page at the moment. I received a great 5 page birth story from one of ‘my dads’ yesterday and had to share this quote with you:

“The midwife held the mirror under her and giggled.

‘He…she’s…still in the bag, but there’s a little hole in it so there’s a tiny tuft of hair sticking out.’

I had a glance. ‘It looks like he’s having highlights done.’ I reported back.”

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The Queen, Duchess of Cambridge and HypnoBirthing

HypnoBirthing Croydon

I’ve read recently that Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge, is considering using HypnoBirthing™. I’m not sure whether this is true – these stories always come from ‘a source’ which seems to be code for ‘made up by the journalist’.

Anyway, I mention elsewhere on my site that HypnoBirthing™ was founded by Mickey Mongan who was herself inspired by ‘Childbirth without Fear’, written by Grantly Dick Read. A HypnoBirthing™ colleague has a 1954 of that very book and has written saying,

” On the paper bookcover, lower right, preserved by a plastic overcover, is a quote:
`Into a world where pain and fear are rampant – this book brings a message of hope.’

The Queen.”

So there you are: The Queen used the forerunner to HypnoBirthing™ to birth Prince Charles and The Princess Royal. If she hadn’t had a good birth she wouldn’t have authorised a quote to be attributed to her on the cover. Here’s hoping that Kate’s Grandmother-in-law is giving her some useful tips.

Happy New Year Baby!

HypnoBirthing Croydon

Another year has passed and I have been reflecting on what 2012 has brought with it – it has been quite  a year both professionally and personally for me, with lots of people helping me along the way, usually without even realising that they are helping me. I have been blessed to encounter so many lovely people who I have enjoyed working and studying with.

In my HypnoBirthing™ I have worked with:

  • couples who have had babies in the breech position and HypnoBirthing™ has helped the baby turn;
  • cynical dads (you know who you are!) who have really embraced HypnoBirthing™, realising that it is actually based on common sense and I’m not the hippy that they feared;
  • mums who thought an elective caesarean section might be the easier option only to end up looking forward to a natural birth after using HypnoBirthing™;Croydon HypnoBirthing
  • couples who haven’t had ‘text-book births’ but who have raved about how great their experience was because HypnoBirthing™ helped them to ‘own’ the decision making process;
  • mums who have been hospitalised during pregnancy so the HypnoBirthing™ sessions have taken place at hospital;
  • a mum who birthed her baby on 10/11/12!
  • lectured to student and registered midwives on how HypnoBirthing™ can facilitate a ‘normal birth’ and helped midwives to understand how they can best help HypnoBirthing parents.

In my BabyCalm™ work I have worked with:

  • Expectant first time parents who were nervous about what on earth wouldhow to calm a baby happen when their baby was born who went on to have lovely early days with their newborn;
  • New parents who thought that they were getting this parenting-lark wrong but actually when we talked about it in the Colic & Crying Workshop realised they were doing a great job;
  • New first-time mums who made great new friends in the Mother & Baby classes;
  • New second-time around mums who wanted to do things differently this time

Of course, bullet-pointing it like this doesn’t give scope to tell you how much I’ve enjoyed working with parents this year – with them typically arriving a little uncertain and leaving with raised self-confidence.

I’ve spent another year studying and attending some great events:

  • At the Royal College of Medicine Hypnosis in Childbirth Seminar I heard how HypnoBirthing™ is being used in the NHS and about the research being conducted by Professor Soo Downe (watch this space!)
  • At the BabyCalm Conference in London I met Michel Odent who spoke on the importance of Oxytocin in the post-natal bonding process, Naomi Stadlen who spoke on ‘What Mothers Do’ and Oliver James who spoke on ‘Love Bombing’. All very thought provoking.
  • At the HypnoBirthing™ Institute Study Day in London I heard the founder of HypnoBirthing™, Mickey Mongan, speak about the improvements being made to the HypnoBirthing™ course.
  • Exhibited at the NCT Baby Show at Trinity School, Croydon, meeting lots of expectant and new parents and meeting lots of other birth and baby professionals
  • Exhibited at the Mothercare Baby & Me Event, again meeting a cross-section of expectant parents.

I was also awarded the Gold Seal by the HypnoBirthing Institute and the HypnoBirthing UK Advisory Board nominated me as the Regional Liaison for South London.

Croydon HypnoBirthingPhew! What a year! On top of all this, I took up running this time last year (not a New Year Resolution, just happened to find a fantastic pair of running shoes) and went from being able to run about 100m (I kid you not!) to running the Croydon 10K in October in 7 minutes less than I anticipated with the 2 best supporters in the world cheering me on!

I wonder how 2013 will top that!

HypnoBirthing in the News

Did I mention that I contributed to another article in Practical Parenting and Pregnancy Magazine? This article nicely explains how HypnoBirthing can help you have a calm easy birth.

Dadzclub have also used my article on how Dads can be involved in pregnancy and the birth process – and end up a Super-Hero!

Here it is on Dadzclub.

I hope you enjoy them both. x

How to choose a HypnoBirthing course

When I was pregnant looking for a HypnoBirthing® Practitioner there were few courses in the UK and I had to travel quite some way to find my nearest class. These days there are many more HypnoBirthing® courses available which means you can choose the perfect course for you. A good place to start is to work out what you want to achieve from the course and then use the pointers below to see how you can meet those aims.

Qualification of Teacher

There are many types of teacher around and to understand better what they offer, it’s useful to understand how HypnoBirthing® came about. HypnoBirthing® was established in the 1980s by Marie (Mickey) Mongan, a college dean and certified hypnotherapist. Mickey devised a comprehensive childbirth education programme, which fully prepares couples to enjoy their pregnancy and to birth gently and easily; only Certified HypnoBirthing® Practitioners offer that course in full. A Certified Practitioner will have qualified through the HypnoBirthing® Institute founded by Mickey Mongan and to remain a Certified Practitioner he or she needs to undertake a significant amount of continued professional development. Only those who have qualified with the HypnoBirthing® Institute and continue their professional development may call themselves Certified HypnoBirthing® Practitioners although many find that a bit of a mouthful; I have to admit I don’t always use the full moniker. A good rule of thumb is that a Certified Practitioner uses a capital H and B and the ‘®’ symbol in the word HypnoBirthing® and makes reference to ‘The Mongan Method’ and is listed on the HypnoBirthing® Institute’s Directory. There are of course other types of teachers. A quick Google search shows me teachers who have studied alternative, less comprehensive courses or hypnotherapists who have added hypnosis for childbirth to their portfolio. A Certified Practitioner won’t mind being asked about their training background so ask if you are not sure.

Content of Course

A Certified HypnoBirthing® Practitioner will offer the full course which will include

  • Understanding how fear causes birth to be painful
  • Releasing that fear and replacing it with a positive emotion
  • Hypnosis – by the Practitioner, by yourself and by your partner
  • Relaxation techniques
  • Breathing techniques – and no I don’t mean any of that awful puffing and panting you see on TV!
  • Light Touch Massage – learned by the birth companion and is akin to using a TENS machine!
  • Visualisation techniques
  • Ultra-deepening Techniques
  • Nutrition
  • Exercise
  • How to write a birth plan
  • Positions to use during childbirth
  • Understanding the birth process
  • Post natal bonding
  • Breastfeeding

It’s quite a list isn’t it and for the purposes of this article it would have been nice to have less bullet points but the point of HypnoBirthing® is that it is a comprehensive ante-natal programme for couples. If you opt for a course run by someone other than a Certified Practitioner, ensure that you understand which of the above topics is not covered and whether your partner has a role in the process.

Times / Dates

A Certified HypnoBirthing® Practitioner must offer all of the course content over 4 x 3 hour sessions or 5 x 2.5 hour sessions; it would be impossible to offer the course in a shorter time frame and if they don’t adhere to that schedule a Practitioner will lose their certification. Again, a quick Google search shows teachers who offer short crammer style courses, perhaps over a weekend and/or as briefly as 1 or 2 hours. If you opt for a shorter course be sure that you understand what the course entails.

Personality

You’ll probably narrow down your search to a couple of Practitioners and your final selection may come down to personality. Contact those on your short list. Most expectant parents e-mail me but the easiest way to really work out how you get on with someone is to phone them and have a chat. As the mother of 2 HypnoBirthed children it is entirely possible that madness will be ensuing when you call in which case I would always offer to call you back at a mutually convenient time, as would any other Practitioner.

Hopefully this article has helped you work out the best HypnoBirthing® Practitioner for you. It would be really interesting to know what else you might look for in a Practitioner so do leave a comment or send a message.

Helen Redfern BA (Hons) IDPC HBCE is a Certified HypnoBirthing Practitioner based in South Croydon. Helen offers HypnoBirthing courses for couples across South London, North Surrey and North Kent.

Gold Standard

HypnoBirthing® in the UK has had some great news in the past month. The Federation of Antenatal Educators “FEDANT” has formally recognised HypnoBirthing® by granting National Register admission to Certified HypnoBirthing® Practitioners – that’s people like me!

FEDANT’s primary purpose is to protect the public by providing a National Register of validated professionals and HypnoBirthing’s admission to FEDANT’s Register gives us a Gold Standard at a time when is a bewildering array of independent qualifications in Antenatal Education.

I’m so pleased that the HypnoBirthing® community has been recognised in this way.

 “Many parents are choosing to use HypnoBirthing as part of their birth preparation and it is a testament to the skill and dedication of those in the sector that awards have been developed which fulfil the requirements of both education and safety” – Angela Stone, Secretary. FEDANT

Nothing works?

Marie (Mickey) Mongan, the founder of HypnoBirthing®, recently presented the following speech at the HypnoBirthing® Convention. I thought it would be worth sharing this since it explains what mums have to do during their baby’s birth:

With HypnoBirthing NOTHING works!

We see it often – HypnoBirthing® mothers accept that they have the ability to relax through the first phase of labor. But when it comes to talking about the baby’s descent and birthing, the question is, “What do I do then?” My answer is always the same – “NOTHING!! That’s what I want you to get out of this course. The understanding of doing “Nothing!!”

With HypnoBirthing® NOTHING works. It’s Nature’s perfect design from the very onset.

Let’s look at a newborn baby girl – as she emerges, who teaches her to breathe? She does absolutely nothing to make it happen – but it happens.

If properly placed and encouraged, she crawls and bobbles her way to the breast for her first meal outside the womb. There is nothing that anyone gives her in the way of instruction – A natural GPS??

Within minutes of being born, she releases her anal sphincters, and out comes her first stool, or she pees. How does she do that without a chart of how to perform timely bodily functions?

Over time, as she grows and develops, with nothing to tell her how or when or how many times, she learns that she can sneeze to clear her nasal passages; she can signal that she is hungry or wants attention if it’s not readily there; she startles and becomes alert if she is frightened; and, if she feels secure, she can relax and fall asleep in loving arms. What did she do to learn to fall asleep? Nothing! Who taught her to awaken? How did she know she was hungry?

Fast forward to when she is a teenager. Her body changes with nothing but internal hormonal secretions to act as catalysts – she becomes a woman. The power of nothing is, and has been, alive in her human experience in so many ways, and she has mastered many functions with nothing but instinct to guide her.

Nothing has to teach her that she is experiencing her first love. She instinctively knows it and feels it. And when the time is right, there is nothing she has to study to learn how to express that love physically.

But enter the miracle of pregnancy, and all of a sudden, her previous trust, power, and confidence crumbles. She is now taught that her body is incapable of leading her through what should be a perfectly magical time. She must now be carefully taught how to nurture her pregnant body and her baby and ultimately how to give birth.

She is further taught that her trust and dependence is best placed outside of her own abilities and externally placed into the hands of others – strangers, trained and practiced experts, who know better than she. She needs them now to efficiently and conveniently manage her birth. They will teach and guide her along each step of the way. Instinct be damned!

She is now categorized onto charts – primagravida, and she’s put onto schedules, and regimens. She learns that she is inadequate and almost irrelevant to her own birthing experience.

For the woman who senses this as a disconnect, there are two options. She can go along with the prevailing model, or she can trust birthing, register for a HypnoBirthing® class and learn to do nothing!!

We know that many of our moms hear a common question when they say they are preparing to birth their baby with HypnoBirthing®. The question often is “Are you out of your mind.” In truth the response to that is “Yes.” To rely on her basic birthing instincts, a mother literally needs to be “out of her mind”. That’s where she turns her birthing over to her body and gets her mind and the regimens and techniques out of the way.

That’s exactly where we want our moms to be. When we teach them otherwise – how to do, and when to do, and how often to do – we confuse the inner consciousness, which controls instinct. Instinct no longer can function – we have stifled the natural function with the clutter of confused, panicked mind talk.

We strip it of the internal knowing, and then we turn to drugs as an external means of forcing the body to do what it used to know how to do. We know that drugs inhibit the bonding experience at birth, and mind talk also inhibits bodily function. Instead of achieving the objective, we confuse the body and it abdicates.

My question to all is: How dare we? How dare we presume to think that we can manipulate and redesign and introduce confusion into the experience with our own special outlines, instructions and techniques? How dare we mess with what is already perfectly created?

When we distribute charts and lists and lessons, filled with exercises and positions and advice,in effect,we are telling our parents that they need to do more and they need to do it this or that way at particular times. We need to bring about an awareness that what we teach in HypnoBirthing® is not the cornerstone of HypnoBirthing®, but rather suggestions to pass time.

Parents panic. They are afraid they will forget what we carefully instilled. They question are they doing it “right’? The only important thing is that they learn to do nothing – to just “allow” – to be the mammals that they are and return to their basic instincts.

Birthing has a rhythm and a flow, and every bit of “fixing” that we impose helps to disturb and shut down that very rhythm and flow. What they need to develop is a mastery to be “Out of their minds.” We need to stop humanizing birth. We have to put aside our own egos and our need to be a relevant factor in their birthing.

The time has come when we need to stop labeling these births as “exceptional” and “fantastic” and “out of this world.” They need to be seen as the norm and not out of the ordinary. When we no longer feel that we have to talk about how shocked and surprised the caregivers are, we will have begun to make progress. These will be the births that all mothers will expect when they are “out of their minds” and doing Nothing.

——Mickey Mongan, Director and Founder of the HypnoBirthing® Institute